High Heels High Hopes

Hey there. So the weather has been pretty great lately.. I love it. Great weather makes everything just so much better. I’m looking forward to April.. vacation, many concerts, softball games, constant nice weather, etc. I love life. I just do. I’m so excited for summer oh my gosh. I’m especially excited to travel and go to California; I’ve always wanted to go and dreamed of just visiting once and finally I can! Softball tryouts started Monday.. Monday did not go too well for me. I am SO out of shape, it’s horrible. I felt like I absolutely sucked on tryouts the first day, then yesterday did a little better, and now today I feel like I did my best out of the 3 days. It’s amazing what nice weather and a little faith in yourself can do. I always try to tell myself “You can do it! Don’t give up!” whenever I’m doubting myself. Sometimes it is soo hard to pick yourself up and feel good about yourself, but life’s too short to waste it being unhappy. When I’m sad I feel terrible. It’s not a good feeling for me. Some people like to be sad, like honestly I used to love being sad. I really don’t know why. I think it made me feel safer at the time, but I realized it doesn’t. You need to express your feeling to someone and tell them how you feel. That’s when I learned I really love to be alone. But when you’re happy, everything changes. I feel closer to God and have more faith than ever. I feel like I have a better outlook on life and just overall have a better understanding of things. For example, I just do not get why people are mean. Simple as that. Why would you ever ever ever want to make someone feel bad about themselves or insecure because of what your words or actions have done to them. The littlest thing can affect somebody without you even knowing it. People should really be careful of their word choices and how they say things. It upsets me so so much. Anyways I just love seeing other people happy. Happiness honestly makes the world go round! Have faith and believe in yourself, and never ever ever give up.. and make sure to love your family, love your friends, love yourself, love your life.

Wow. If I can choose one word to sum up the end of Play season, I’d say bittersweet. As a freshman last year, the musical I participated in was The Music Man. That was so fun; the people, play, and everything was just so great. It was new and exciting of course and I didn’t really know what to expect. I made so many good friends in the play last year. But this year, it’s a little different. This year was special. I have learned so much more about theatre, music, acting, dancing, everything. My friendships have grown stronger with the returning cast, plus I made soo many new friends. Rehearsals were so long, I mean SO long. They took up almost every hour after school of everyday of the week. I didn’t have a life other then play. Now that it’s over, I feel like part of me is missing. Ha, I’m serious. It was the saddest thing hearing the seniors speeches, but I know I will see them for a few months until they all go away :|. Anyways, now I will have so much free time.. well only for a week. Softball starts in 2 weeks (sigh). I’m looking forward to it, but not how much time it’s going to take up. I want a break, that’s like, at least a month. Probably going to have to wait for summer for that. Lately, I’ve been thinking about summer too much. The beautiful sunny weather, the awesome vacations, the crazy concerts, and the memories and times I will spend with my friends. It’s going to be wonderful. I actually wish I didn’t wish so much of my life away. I am looking forward to things in each month up ‘til summer, but I want to enjoy life more day by day. I have an amazing life, and of course it is no way near perfect, but I have everything and so much more. As Joe Schuberth said in his senior speech tonight, “You don’t know what you have until it’s not there anymore.” It’s really true, about everything. Never take advantage of anything, anyone or any day that goes by. We all are blessed to be here right now and we should thank God in every possible way. Well, anyways the past few days have been hectic though. From play, to family, to friends, to school and CAPT testing, wow. I need to rest, lol. One of my favorite things ever to do is just sit and listen or sing to music, and think about memories. Memories from my childhood, memories from last year, and memories from just the other day. Those things make me so happy. People actually make me happy, really happy. Especially someone recently. He’s great. Yeah. Really great, actually. Anyways.. just wanted to update on this thing. It’s fun now that I kind of know what I’m doing lol. I actually have some followers! Cool! I love you guys, because I know who you all are and you are all my friends. So, I want to thank you. And thank you anyone else for reading this. God bless.

Well, this is my first post. I’m not sure exactly if I’m doing this ‘right’ or what to write but I’m sure no one will read this. I just thought I’d make a tumblr and record my thoughts. Maybe one day I’ll look back and totally laugh at what I said and what I was thinking. Now, being a sophomore in high school.. it’s so much different then a freshman. Freshman year was really fun. New friends, old friends, new school, new opportunities, new challenges, new music, new activities, new me. 7th grade had to be my biggest growing/learning year ever. Last year was actually just as much as a learning experience, though. I’ve made so many new friends who I love so so much. Being a sophomore in high school is now a challenge. The work is harder, more stressful.. the people sometimes aren’t as nice, friendly.. but I still have my closest friends. I thank God everyday throughout the day for the opportunities I have in my life. I have so much and most of the time I seem to take advantage of it. I’ve had such a strong relationship with God in the past year, I feel like such a better person. I’ve listened to new music, music I wouldn’t usually listen to. Music I would listen to all the time but I don’t anymore.. For instance, those Jonas Brothers. Wow, the past 3 years (yet, seemed like a lifetime) they have been my entire life. I’ve seen them over 23 times. I would non stop listen to them, legit. They covered my walls, they’d be all I talk about, think about, even cared about at a time. I was usually referred to ‘Emily Jonas Musson’. I love those boys, I always will.. but growing up and finding myself more I’ve realized there’s more to life then just the Jonas Brothers. Yeah, I can’t believe I’d ever say that. I will always always always support them 100% and be a fan but I am not as obsessed like I was before. Yes I was obsessed but now discovering new bands, going to more concerts, and making new friends I’ve learned to like so much other music that I listen to even more then them. It’s really sad to think about something so big in your life just start to fade a little bit. I’ve made a close million friends because of those boys, I’ve had the BEST experiences in my life because of them, it’s just weird to see them not the first thing on my mind anymore. Albums may be put to the side, t-shirts pushed to the back of the drawer, most of the posters taken down, but with those memories it will never fade and they’ve made me who I am. I’m so thankful that I have great role models to look up to. You know, it’s weird but I’ve had some pretty awesome experiences just as great as those with other musicians and friends. This year is stressful but worth it. I’m learning who my true friends are and realized how thankful I am. I am so lucky to have such a wonderful family, friends, and great opportunities in my life, and I’m only 15! I recently went to a concert in Long Island, NY called Pop-Con. It was a few weeks ago, Feb. 20 to be exact, and there was an expo hall doing ‘karaoke’. I love love love to sing but never have the confidence to sing in front of people. It’s kind of like stage fright alone. I built up the courage to go on that stage and perform in front of so many people. It was the most amazing feeling after. I knew I had to do it because I want to be a performer but I never had the courage to do what I did. I prayed to God and he answered my prayer. It felt so amazing and it gained my confidence about 80%. Recently, I’ve been very happy. Other then CAPT testing, my life is pretty awesome lately. My Grammy is unfortunately in the hospital because she’s not doing too well. If you’re reading this, please pray for her and everyone you have in your life. I just want to thank everyone I have in my life, good and bad, we’re all in everything together. I want to let you know that I love you whoever you are. We all need love. Sometimes things can be so hard and you feel like giving up but remember, life rolls on..